School administrators, especially superintendents and principals, catch it coming and going. Just about every decision or policy inevitably angers somebody, whether teachers, parents or students. If the decision was different, somebody else would be angry.

They are often in no-win situations, but it comes with the job, and administrators generally don’t push back publicly, but at the Sept. 15 meeting of the District 153 Board of Education, Superintendent Scott McAlister made an exception.

A parent who was upset about the decision to hold an institute day on a Wednesday, which is generally less convenient for parents, and posted on a local social media page asking “how the childless superintendent could be allowed to create a calendar” with institute days on Wednesdays. It was the reference to his personal life that offended McAlister.

“It’s not often that I respond publicly to something on social media, but I felt the need to do so tonight,” he said. “I can accept criticism and I encourage people who have questions to call or come in and meet with me face to face. I feel it is quite unfortunate that some adults feel the need to express their disagreement through social media, rather than going directly to the source and inquiring as to why we do the things that we do.

“Criticize the decisions I make all you want, but do not question the personal decisions that my wife and I have made.”

For the record, the calendar is set by committee. School board members and teachers union representatives spoke in support of McAlister.

He noted that social media platforms have been “specifically designed to be hurtful and antagonizing,” he said.

I take two lessons from this situation. One, give administrators a little grace. It’s perfectly OK to question decisions, but do just that, question rather than accuse. Second, ask through direct channels rather than airing gripes on social media.

That’s hard. When you’re upset, taking the time to call, visit or email an administrator is less satisfying than a quick vent online.

McAlister said the impact of taking gripes online can be broader than one conflict over scheduling.

“When we wonder why there’s an educator shortage, we need to consider the manner in which the public is interacting with those who work in our schools,” he said. “If we do not do better with how we treat those in this profession, we risk losing committed and caring people doing this incredibly important and rewarding work. It is time for all adults to model the behavior we seek in our children.”

It might help to remember that most social media platforms are run by companies obligated to make the most profit they can for investors. It’s the capitalist way. Unfortunately, rage pays. Platforms have evolved to invite and reward hard words. It’s worth remembering that social media companies benefit from behavior that can hurt communities.

They are not on our side.

The system that invites rifts has no remorse or shame. It measures success by profits in the billions. The rifts it encourages and profits from cause damage that can be difficult to repair.

The system doesn’t care.

It reminds me of another system that does not care about the damage it causes. Racism. On that note …

Books Without Borders udpate

Jackie Riffice is keeping the conversation about race in the public eye, where it has to be if the community is going to make progress. At Homewood and Flossmoor board meetings in October, she reported on the first meeting of Books Without Borders book club where more than 20 people came together to discuss “So You Want to Talk About Race” by Ijeoma Oluo.

“I imagined a safe space to listen, learn, and connect, especially when it comes to things that both unite and divide us, including race. I imagined open minds, diverse perspectives, and meaningful dialogue,” she said at the Homewood meeting on Oct. 14. “We had an intimate and safe setting to learn and unlearn while respecting our different lived experiences.”

She said the group was diverse, including trustees, clergy, school board members and community leaders. She said two categories could describe the group. Some were “the choir,” those who have studied and experienced race, and “the curious.”

“I don’t know what brought them individually, but I got the feeling they wanted to know more, to understand better, to do better,” she said. “This was the group … that didn’t know much about systemic racism or white privilege or the talk that parents have with their young black boys. Yet in their discomfort, they also stepped in and stepped up. They are my hope and I know they’ll be back.”

Choir and curious alike will have another chance to delve into the issues from 6:45 to 8 p.m. Tuesday, Nov. 11, at Beyond Borders Cafe at 1036 Sterling Ave. in Flossmoor.

The discussion will focus on “Stamped: Racism, Anti-Racism and You” by Jason Reynolds and Ibram X. Kendi. The book is based on Kendi’s longer study, “Stamped from the Beginning” and presents the history of racist ideas in an accessible, concise form.

Copies are available at The Rock Shop, 18109 Dixie Highway in Homewood and at bookshop.org.